from the Livestock Trading Board

Garden Gossips

Price: $10 (set of six)

Beetles were once put on trial for creeping secretly in the earth, but they have nothing on our Garden Gossips. A proprietary hybrid of flying beetle with a home range of five miles, they forage not for pollen or carrion or such, but for information. If peeking through curtains and listening at yard fences isn't enough to satisfy your curiosity about your neighbors' affairs, Garden Gossips will bring you all the juiciest tidbits and dance them out for you. Beetle dance interpretation booklet included. (Disclaimer: not responsible for misinformation obtained by beetles. Also not responsible for environmental impacts of free-range beetles. Novelty use only.)

- Creeper Keepers