Nov. 3rd, 2022

scrubjayspeaks: Town sign for (fictional) Lake Lewisia, showing icons of mountains and a lake with the letter L (Lake Lewisia)
Hellfire Heated Blankets

Price: $150

Tired of waking up chilly on a winter morning? Sick of ending your day in a bed with icy, unwelcoming sheets? Prepared to go to supernatural lengths to get warm? The Hellfire heated blanket comes imbued with tiny, captive demons sewn right into the channels between layers. With 10 heat levels and a fully customizable timer, your bed can always be warm at the right time. An energy-efficient device, it uses no electricity and instead runs on weekly offerings. May cause unusual dreams and temptations to supervillainy.

- Sophie's Home Goods

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